I think everyone goes through some periods of blah in their life, in relationships, even in their God time. I know I do. I feel like I have been in a long season of blah for that matter. I'll be honest with you that when things are up in the air, sometimes it gets hard to talk to God. It's not that you have lost any faith, but it just feels awful saying the same things in prayer over and over again sometimes. I feel guilty if I don't pray for RB's healing, yet it weighs on me to have to think about it sometimes. I'm not saying this is every day, but sometimes. But here I am, praying, reading my Bible, and plugging along in faith despite the blah-ness I sometimes feel.
I was reading in 1 Corinthians 13 today and was just reminded of how little we really read that entire chapter. Not just the "what love is" part, but the before and after. I don't want to be just a gong that drives people crazy because I cannot speak what I have to say in love. We need to fall in love with our families, our friends, and the world again (as I was so aptly reminded by someone close to me). We need to be so in love with them that we reach out to them, tell them the truth, and love on them deeply. Not becoming the world or sin or whatever, but loving them as Jesus did. Jesus hung out with sinners and called them out on it. His love was so profound it either pulled people down to their knees to repentance or it made them lash out in anger. I want to be able to fully love people. I want to be able to let go of bitterness, anger, my "right" to be angry, awkwardness, that feeling that someone may not like you, or whatever it is that holds me back and just love them fully. This doesn't mean I stay silent, on the contrary. I encourage you to read that entire passage and really ponder all it has to offer, all that God is saying there.
Christmas time is coming, it is finally cold here, and what are we thinking about? Is it trees, or garland or lights? Or is it how the One, God, the All Mighty Himself sent His Son who is fully God and fully man to become a baby. Would you willingly give up the status of God to become a baby, to live perfectly yet be killed for it? To take on the sins of the world? Would you do it? I wouldn't, which is one of the many reasons I am not God. I am not perfect. But just think about it, think about God being a baby. As a mother of a 9 month old (almost), I know what a baby is like and I cannot fathom God's plan fully. I cannot really wrap my mind around it wholly. One of my friends said that when they thought about it, the way they saw it was God was desperate. I think that is accurate, but not in a human desperate way. God was desperate for His name to be glorified in His creation. God was desperate to reunite His creation with Himself. God knew from day one what would happen and what that would mean. He knew what sacrifice He would have to make for relationship, yet He still paid that price. He could easily not have made us, yet He chose to. Whoa! What an incredible thing.
Advent is here. He has come, Emmanuel, God with us.