Here is my confession: I follow too many blogs.
I really do. And I have such good intentions to read them all. And most of them say really awesome things. But there are just too many to keep up with. If I can find a way to send your blog update to my email, the odds that I will read your blog greatly increases. The rest of you... beware.
I used to keep up with them really well, but for about... a year (I think you can guess what happened a year ago by my last post)... life has just been a little more busy. So, I am sitting here right now when I should be reading the
world's worst book my ethics textbook, reading blogs and writing to you out there. How many of you read these things any way? Just asking.
Sometimes though, don't you just need a break? Don't you have this long list of things to do, but really (and I mean really) you just need to do nothing? Don't you need to go running, to return some foam board, to get a new sippy cup, to read some textbooks, to do dishes, to change the laundry, to clean the house, to spray some weeds, to knock down a wasp nest....? Or is it just me. Well, maybe that exact list is just me. I think we are just too busy. I want to be relaxed. I won't lie to you and say that I want to be a complete free spirit, because if you've ever met me you know that too much free time is where my spirit goes to die. I need some semblance of a routine and schedule. I need some things to do, to get out of the house a little bit. But I don't want to be busy any more. I have spent a lot of my life riding the busy coaster. It's kind of weird because I thrive on pressure and having too little time to get things done. The semester I took 12 hours of class - B average, the semester I took 19 hours of class, worked 30 hours a week, and got 12 hours a week in the practice room - 4.0. I enjoy the rush, the pressure, the chaos, the structure, the structure, the structure of being busy. But God has called me to stop, to slow down, to quiet my heart. God has showed me that in the busy I have left Him out of the equation. There is not time to spend an hour journaling and praying when your life is jam packed with 80,000 things. Nap time should not always be when I cram all the work I would normally do in 24 hours into 2 hours. I cannot multi-task my child.
Now there will be days (and even weeks) of busy. There will be days when RB has to sit in the shopping cart more than she would prefer, there will be days when she must play alone while I change out the laundry. This will happen. Guaranteed. However, I do not have to give in to the notion that my every day must look like this.
And don't we pass this on to our children? Don't we enroll them in after school activities, and sports, and art class, and kumon or something to take up every night? Don't we schedule their summers full of camps and splash pads and events to pass the time? Don't we teach them that "chillin" is unproductive and, therefore, useless? I am all for camp, splash pads, museums, art class, sports, etc, but let's take some time off too. Let's have a night or two a week that is not scheduled. Let's have family time at home. Let's watch a movie, let's wrestle in the living room, let's make a fort to read books in. Let's run through sprinklers in the backyard. Let's slow down. Let's talk to each other. Let's write letters.
Let's be different.