Brave Adventure

Brave Adventure

Thursday, January 30, 2014

Newborn Photos

So my good friend, the lovely and talented M.W. did my little guy's newborn photos. With RB I was a slacker and didn't do them until she was a full month old, but I was more on the ball with Tiny Dinosaur. Here are a few of my favorites! Enjoy the cuteness!

Friday, January 17, 2014

22 Months

Happy 22 Months!

We thought we would change it up today with a different background - she liked it
Fun facts for month twenty-two:
Weight: 28lbs
Height: 30+ inches
Eating: 3 meals a day and 1-2 snacks
Sleeping: 2 Naps during the day (although sometimes it is 1 rest and 1 nap)
Diaper: Size 4 diapers
Clothing: 12-18 month clothes and some 18 month clothes (she actually fits into some 2T pants - crazy)

What's new for month twenty-two:
  • She is SO talkative
  • She loves her grandparents
  • She is getting more comfortable with child care at church
  • She is very confused between up and down, she says both interchangeably 
  • Reading, reading, reading! She even pretends to read to herself sometimes
  • She is such a helper
  • She loves books (not in reality)
  • She wants to walk, don't mention the word if you don't want to go out
  • We are in the spelling phase - as in we spell words because she understands them
  • You can tell what phase we are in by her newest words "crying", "pat pat", and other words related to her brother
  • She is getting better at saying brother's name
  • She loves to walk up to CJM and say "Hey Buddy!" because that's what I say
  • She is really soaking up any attention she can get and enjoys play dates with more fervor because of having to share me when we're at home
  • She is getting more independent

Love this thing

What are you doing? I'm only slightly distracted from my previous task

She loves to sit on her knees

Soooooo Big!

What is C doing?

Current favorite books

Mom and Baby Selfie!

Thursday, January 16, 2014

Early this morning

So just as a caveat: this post is not a cry for help, a way to ask yo to give me something or babysit or anything like that, it's not a search for pity, it is just a way for me to get out some of my emotions this morning as I feel overwhelmed - it helps me process to write it down and get it out.

I am angry. I am so angry that I'm in tears. I had a harder day yesterday with lots of meltdowns and both kiddos just giving me a tough time. Then we went to church which is always a good thing, but keeps us up later than normal. We didn't eat dinner until after church so I got to bed around two hours later than I normally do. And this was a day that I desperately needed sleep to have a fresh start for the next day.

Then 4:30am happened. My son decided not to sleep. He ate and fell asleep like normal, but then once he was put down decided to cry and cry and cry. It took me an hour to get him to fall asleep, then I went to sleep, and he woke up thirty minutes later. I couldn't have been asleep more than 15 minutes. Then he proceeded to scream. I mean for real. Nothing I could do made it better. I changed his diaper, I tried to feed him again, I rocked, I paci'd, I cuddled, and he screamed. My nerves began to unravel and I began to get angry at this kid because he would not sleep. And then angry at God. I pray every single night that God will allow me to sleep so that I can more effectively care for these kids. And God has seen fit to say no. Why? It's not like I won't have to rely on Him during the day, it's already hard enough just to take care of the two kids. Can't he allow me the night off? Why is it that this kid only melts down during my shifts and not during his father's shifts? Why does the husband get to leave and go to work, kid free, while I have to stay here?

So I woke up the husband early and gave him the baby because I'm angry. Because I am pulling the covers over my head to have a good cry. Because I feel like I'm going to explode. Because I feel like those last few precious hours of sleep were stolen from me and I'm beginning this day exhausted rather than refreshed. Because even my Bible study this morning did not feel like it hit home and I'm running on empty. And it's only 7:20am. And kid number 1 just woke up (I can hear her talking to herself) and kid number 2 is still screaming in the other room. And because I have not successfully napped during the day (except when medicated) in years.

The end.

Sunday, January 12, 2014

One Month

Happy One Month of Life Tiny Dinosaur!

Fun facts for month one:
Weight: 10+ lbs
Height: 22+ inches
Eating: Every 2-3hrs during the day, Every 3-5hrs at night
Sleeping: All the time...
Diaper: Size 1 diapers
Clothing: 0-3 months (he actually outgrew his first 0-3month outfit this week)

What's new for month one:
  • He is getting great at lifting up his head - strong neck
  • Eating, pooping, peeing like a champ
  • Very vocal
  • Mommy's boy except when it comes to swaddling, he likes Daddy's swaddling best
  • Loves the bouncy seat, hates the swing
  • Still trying to figure out that sleeping in his own bed thing

Saturday, January 11, 2014

How I'm Doing

A lot of people want to know how I'm doing lately. Well most days I'm doing pretty well, holding it together, learning the routine, getting about half as much sleep as I need, and am laughing a lot from sleep deprivation in the evening. This morning, though, I'm doing a little... less good? This is my face (pictured above) after being awake since 2:45am. This child is just determined not to sleep tonight. I'm not at all sure why since from day one he has been such a good night sleeper. I am counting down until 7:30am when the husband and I will switch off who is sleeping again. 30 more minutes to go. I have been watching Lost to help keep myself awake. The babe will sleep for small increments of time before needing to be rocked or repositioned or soothed in some way. My left arm hurts - thank you, bouncy seat. So it's pointless for me to try and sleep. It's been taking me a long time to get to sleep these days which is ridiculous since I'm so tired, haha.

What I do want you to know is that even in this, I'm going to be okay. This is just a season. I am relying on God, my prayer life has greatly increased and I am doing a devotional on rest/fresh starts. It's really refreshing. So, I am exhausted. I am overwhelmed. I am in need of a break that won't truly come for several months. I often feel like, when RB won't nap, that the end is near. But I take a deep breath (sometimes I hide in my bathroom), say another prayer, beg the Lord for strength, and keep going. That's what God has called me to do in this moment and He will get me through it.

Well, two more minutes my friends. 

Friday, January 3, 2014

Goodbye 2013, Hello 2014

I don't tend to do resolutions or make goals at the beginning of the year. My goals tend to be more short term than that. But this year, due to a blog I read, I decided to take a stab at it and share my heart with you.

Enjoy my Christmas decor which is still up in honor of my sister's birthday Jan. 7th

I want to know that I am sitting here, enjoying some grapes, goldfish, and hot chocolate as I watch The Return of the King in house full of sleeping babies. That's right, they are both asleep which has afforded me this rare moment to do whatever I want within reason.

As I was thinking through what my resolutions should be, and reading through Today's Letters' suggestions on how to formulate meaningful resolutions here were some of my thoughts - what I really want is a life of travel, adventure, overseas mission work, language study, good food, gardening, hard living, cutting back, and sleep. (I add sleep only because of the Dinosaur's addition to our lives) While many of these make good resolutions, they are all selfish. They make little time for my family, they don't improve my relationship with Christ (in most cases), they don't improve my marriage, etc. The motives especially were selfish. Mission work sounds like this amazing, righteous thing, but my motives are not all together pure. I have been especially jealous of a few of my closest friends who have been allowed to travel and even move overseas recently. It makes me feel like my life is dull. Some of the blogs I read make me feel like that too. So my resolutions are an attempt to empty myself of me, begging The Father to take control, ruin my life for Him. To grab hold of the place He has put me, the family He has given me, and the calling He has put upon my life in this moment. Some of the goals are still just for fun, but some are much more serious. So here they are:

Individual goals:
Discipleship with a friend(s) (1-on-1 or 2-on-1)
Find a friend and bake one new thing a month together
Finish memorizing the book of James
Run a 10k (this is a maybe because of another goal below - I ran a half marathon after RB was born but felt like it was too much time taken away from my family to train so this is a smaller goal)
Have at least 1 cake customer per month
Read enough to fill a book shelf (one shelf) full of books

Family/Marriage goals:
Eat dinner as a family 5x a week – high/low/thankfulness
Read together (out loud)
Do a service project together every quarter
Spiritual – once a week parenting devo book as a couple
Physical – Sprint triathlon as a couple
Relational – dinner with another couple once a month
Financial – save toward a trip to France (to visit family)

I want to remind you as you make goals/resolutions what I was reminded of by the blog. Don't make these resolutions an idol in your life. Don't get so caught in completing these goals that you miss the process. The point of making these goals is the process. It is to be changed, refined, and molded this year. So even if I don't attain all these goals, God will have molded me through the attempt.